Sick of Everything
Well, today started out as a good day but now I feel hopeless.
This morning I went to the community center to get emergency rent assistance, that went well and I was relieved when I left there.
Then I got home and had letters from unemployment saying I was denied for such and such reasons. I'm angry because I tried to get all the info they told me to, and I left voicemails whenever I had trouble getting something or if it was going to be late.
I had a letter from my therapist that they asked me to get, and I got that late and sent it to them. I explained why it was late and that I had an appointment to get a new therapist.
Then when I went to the new therapist it was just an interview and they didn't evaluate me, so I couldn't get the form filled out for UI.
So I called unemployment and left a message about how I'm having trouble with the form and need to talk about it.
I didn't get a call back and then I received the letters today.
I think I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.
I can't get unemployment because I can't work, I can't get disability because I haven't been out of work long enough and don't have enough medical information either.
So now I have no way to survive. I can't get a job, if I did I wouldn't make enough money to be able to pay my bills in time. I can't get unemployment, I can't get disability.
So looks like I'll be unable to pay for december rent or most of my other bills, and then I'll have nowhere to live.
I don't see any options or choices that I have, and I'm very anxious about everything.
I was so upset when I got those letters and when I called to figure out what to do. And now I don't feel any better, I'm trying to calm down and it's not working. I just feel angry, hopeless, and depressed.
I figure I'd be used to having those feelings and having no life, but it still shocks me sometimes. Guess it's a short glimpse from behind denial.
Times like this I wish I really was The Crow.
This morning I went to the community center to get emergency rent assistance, that went well and I was relieved when I left there.
Then I got home and had letters from unemployment saying I was denied for such and such reasons. I'm angry because I tried to get all the info they told me to, and I left voicemails whenever I had trouble getting something or if it was going to be late.
I had a letter from my therapist that they asked me to get, and I got that late and sent it to them. I explained why it was late and that I had an appointment to get a new therapist.
Then when I went to the new therapist it was just an interview and they didn't evaluate me, so I couldn't get the form filled out for UI.
So I called unemployment and left a message about how I'm having trouble with the form and need to talk about it.
I didn't get a call back and then I received the letters today.
I think I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.
I can't get unemployment because I can't work, I can't get disability because I haven't been out of work long enough and don't have enough medical information either.
So now I have no way to survive. I can't get a job, if I did I wouldn't make enough money to be able to pay my bills in time. I can't get unemployment, I can't get disability.
So looks like I'll be unable to pay for december rent or most of my other bills, and then I'll have nowhere to live.
I don't see any options or choices that I have, and I'm very anxious about everything.
I was so upset when I got those letters and when I called to figure out what to do. And now I don't feel any better, I'm trying to calm down and it's not working. I just feel angry, hopeless, and depressed.
I figure I'd be used to having those feelings and having no life, but it still shocks me sometimes. Guess it's a short glimpse from behind denial.
Times like this I wish I really was The Crow.
posted by eric draven at 5:57 PM
2 Comments:
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Rod
i feel the same way my whole life has been 1 disappointment after another as a kid i was abused as a teenager i was disowned ended up in a refuge turned to drugs ended up in a abusive relationship lost the will to live i have no friends no job im suicidal and now im pregnant with no where to go yay for me
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